shinano: (Default)
 I remember a time. A time and place of where we were together. I didn't need any more nor did I need more. I had all I needed. 
Until...that day....Everything was destroyed. My hopes to live. My reasons. My heart. soul. Everything went down into the drain like it was nothing.
"Why you?" I always asked. Everything. Why...I need you most! When you were my everything! Couldn't it have been someone else?? Why....? I kept everything far away from me. I was left alone. No one loved me. Forgotten by humans. All of my world was colorless...

Everything hurts. It's dark here. I'm scared. I'm alone...come back....please...

"What kind of place is it like there? Have you arrived there yet? And when you do, write back to me." I say to you. For you, a whole new world is opening. The doors widen and you're moving far ahead of me. It would be wonderful if my voice and prayers reached you. There is no other color just like you. You're bright, vivid. And beautiful. An admirable color.

But somehow, that loving color of mine and yours has somehow became a painful one to my eye. It's dull. Meaningless. And has no meaning. It's almost sad; it's as it's parting me from you. My ordinary life used to be filled with crimson. What was so crimson? Love. Graceful love that I had received from you. It was beautiful and dark that you gave to me, the graceful love lifted my heart and life.

Even though you're not here anymore and everything pains me. I can still believe, somewhere far away, you and I can still meet one more. Days go on painfully. Slowly, but surely, we can move on and still be who we were and are. When the door closes, I'll get used to be apart from you. Your gentle smile will become the radiant sun. Smokse of you will become the cloud that soon becomes rain.

My ordinary life that was attached with crimson has become something painful to me now. The dull, colorful crimson was your love. Our graceful love.



shinano: (Default)

January 2013

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